cut above the rest

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

The supposedly cursed one.

I received a supposed invitation to a naming ceremony of a cousin's kid.
My aunt calls me up and says, ''I called to invite u for the function. Do u want to come?'' I did not make much of it and said ''definitely''. She goes on and asks, ''Is it ok with ur hubby? Can he make it, as it is on a week day?''
That quickened me, and i started to think and i said , "Let me see and i will try. ''
That was real strange of her. I know her better than that. Then i realised the reason.

I dont have a child yet, even after 8 yrs of marriage. As per her and many others around me, i wld be considered inauspicious and unlucky as I am a barren woman. They wld most naturally think that i wld be jealous of them and their children and my very gaze upon the little one wld supposedly hasten something evil for the child.

This is modern India for u.

As per me, my worth is not determined by my ability or inability to have a child, or status or even education. i am what i am and my character and nature determine my worth. And what is given me, is for me and the grace that is given to others is for them. Not all, can hope to have what i have and vice-versa.

But has all this clarity on my part helped me today? No. for i received invitations from the cousin's wife side to make it positively to the function.

I am in a fix. If i go, they will be uncomfortable as i wld have to perform some formalities. If i dont go, it wld be regarded as disrespect for their parents; and people wldnt flinch even to give it in writing that it is due to an inferiority complex that i did not make it.

But i got the clarity as i wrote out this blog. I will not hurt them. I will not attend the function. On a later date i can possibly visit the cousin and co.

A widow is also viewed with such disdain here. She cannot participate in any of the functions or participate in any good moment.
Will things change if it happens to their mother or daughter or sister?

Perhaps only with regard to them. Everybody else is cursed.

2 Comments:

  • "Children are a gift from God", i used to hear this alot... yes, it's nice to have kids of ur own, but some kids, i bet their parents wish if they never had them ;)

    what am trying to say, this is not a curse... it might be a blessing, and u just donno it ;) besides, 8 years r nothing :) and ur still young, who knows????

    if i were u, i guess i would have gone with a real nice gift and a wide smile :) what people say, and what people think is their own problem, u r who u r, and nobody can change that, so don't let any1 stop you from living your life the way u want, the way u like :)

    you're a real good person, and i wish u all the best from the buttom of my heart... i wish that someday, all your dreams come true :)

    By Blogger Rain Drop, at 1:25 PM  

  • Thanks friend.Will give it a thought but right now it looks as though it is not worth the expense and the effort. I can do better things than that, right!:) Take off and have fun with my hubby instead!;)

    By Blogger rowdyrascal, at 5:41 AM  

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